Cooking Thread

[DarthLego5679]

Totally not so random, and very similar:

Spoiler

It's probably common, but it's what yours made me think of straight away.

1 Apple (cored) (tart apples work best)
- Peanut Butter
- Semi-Sweet Chocolate Chips
1 stick
1 campfire

Method:
Put half the peanut butter on one opening of the apple. Fill with chocolate chips. Cover other side with peanut butter. Spear and roast.

Definitely going to try this.

 

[Wooffus]

You make cakes too, torty? :O Man, that actually looks great for a friendly get-together. Me and my sweet tooth would like to take a look into something like that.

Yes, I too like baking cakes as well, albeit for parties and barbecues. Though I tend to go by a more simplistic recipe, I can offer a good tip for those wanting healthier options.

When I was giving up chocolate for lent, I wanted a piece of cake but wanted to learn to make something other than chocolate that tastes beautiful. Then one of my many aunts suggested the idea of a lemon cake during that time, specifically for when it was coming close to Mother's Day.

If we take into account torty's recipe, all that needs to be done to make modifications to it is to take out the chocolate, cinnamon and cocoa powder (not quite too sure about the nutmeg? I can't remember using that in a cake or anything) and in their place you grind the skin of a lemon into the mixture, placed in when the cocoa once was.

For an added kick, you can also use the juice of the lemon to add some moisture/softness after baking and cooling down. It works better if there's icing at the top though. What you need to do is to take a pastry brush and gently graze the top of the cake with the lemon juice, being careful not to overflow it at the same time. You may think it may make the cake a bit too soggy, but if applied right, that won't be the case.

And here's a picture of one that I did earlier There we go, a delicious cake that's 100% chocolate free, for anyone that wants to try that modification.

 

[DKnucklehead]

Alright, I haven't contributed a recipe yet, so here is one of my favorite recipes, Popovers, from one of my favorite cookbooks, The King Arthur Flour Baker's Companion. These are easy to prepare and make, and require few ingredients. They also taste great :D My notes are in parenthesis.


Popovers
12 Popovers

3 large eggs
1 1/2 cups of whole milk (I've just used 2% or any other milk)
1 1/2 cups all-purpose flour (6 1/4 ounces) (It's better to make the mistake of having less flour than too much flour in this specific recipe, so don't add extra or something.)
1/2 teaspoon salt
1/4 cup of unsalted butter, melted (1/2 stick, or 2 ounces)
Optional: 1 teaspoon of dried mixed herbs (I've never added these, because the flavor isn't needed or what I want.)

Preheat the oven to 450 degrees Fahrenheit (or 232 Celsius? Correct me if I'm wrong.)

Place all ingredients in a blender in the order indicated above. Blend for 30 seconds, stopping midway through to scrape down the sides of the blender. Allow the batter to rest for 15 minutes.

Using solid shortening or a nonstick vegatable oil spray, thoroughly grease 12 muffin cups (or 6 popover or 12 mini-popover cups). Be sure to grease the area around the cups as well as the cups themselves. Fill the cups about two-thirds full with the batter. Bake for 20 minutes, the reduce the oven to 350 Fahrenheit (177 degrees Celsius?) and bake for an additional 10 minutes (This is an important step!). Resist the urge to open the oven door at any time during this process. Remove the baked popovers from the oven, pierce the tops with a knife (this keeps them from getting soggy), and allow them to cool in the pan for 5 minutes. Then gently turn them out of the pan onto a wire rack. Serve warm.

 

[fenna]

Cooking Good. I make cakes. I make desserts! The thing I don't have is recipies to share, pictures or videos :'( But I do bake :D

 

[Trap_Wolf]

>old thread
>don't care

>

>i maeks cake
>it's pretty

 

[kraby1]

It's funny cause torty <--- means in polish Cakes.

Personally I only ever made a bowl of cereal, maybe a few sandwiches. Buuuut at school, I made a pizza, wrap, cakes, muffins, some soup etc.

when I first made corn flakes:

 

[Megatron]

HOW TO MAKE A MANWICH

STEP 1

BUY SUPPRIES

ONE (1) (I) TIGER BREAD

ONE (UNO) (.) PACKAGE OF STIRFRY BEEF

A FAIR AMOUNT (MANY) (MULTIPLE) ASSORTED VEGETABLES

I AIN'T EVEN GONNA GOOGLE IMAGE SEARCH VEGETABLES YOU KNOW WHAT THEY ARE FUCK

YOU COULD USE ONION, CARROT, BROCOLLI, FUCK I DUNNO WHATEVER IS LOCAL

ANYWAY WHERE WAS I

YEAH

STEP B

STIRFRY YOUR BEEF FOR LIKE WHATEVER THE PACKET SAYS

MAYBE NOT AS LONG SO IT AIN'T CHEWY, YOU DON'T WANT CHEWY FOOD IN A SANDWICH SHIT WHAT'S WRONG WITH YOU

YOU COULD USE SAUCES AND ADD THEM TO THE MEAT WHEN IT'S ALMOST COOKED, FUCK GOD NOW I'M HUNGRY

WHAT WAS I TALKING ABOUT

OH YEAH

WHILE YOUR MEAT IS COOKING

GET YOUR TIGERBREAD

CUT IT IN HALF

THE PIECE ON THE LEFT AS AN EXAMPLE, WE DON'T SLICE IN THIS KITCHEN WE TEAR

ALSO I DON'T UNDERSTAND HOW X-MEN PORN IS RELATED TO BREAD GOOGLE IMAGES

WHATEVER

TEAR OUT ALL THE SOFT WHITE BREAD INSIDE, LEAVING THE HARDER OUTER SHELL AND SOME WHITE AT THE END TO ABSORB LIQUID

EAT THAT SHIT OR SAVE IT FOR LATER TO DUNK IN SOUP OR SOMETHING

STEP THE THIRD

YOUR MEAT SHOULD BE COOKED NICELY. YOU KNOW IT'S COOKED NICELY BY EATING A PIECE. YOU DON'T WANT FOOD POISONING? TOO BAD, THE MANWICH TAKES NO PRISONERS

PUT ALL YOUR VEGETABLES AND ASSORTED SIDEORDERS/SAUCES INTO A HUGE BOWL. PLACE THE DELICIOUS HOT MEATS INTO THE BOWL. YOU COULD EVEN ADD GRAVY IF YOU WANT TO BE THAT MANLY, BUT WE'RE REACHING DANGEROUS LEVELS OF MANERATION AT THIS POINT AND YOU MAY CAUSE AN ADVERSE REACTION IF THERE ARE ANY WOMEN NEARBY. BEARDS DON'T LOOK GOOD ON FEMALES YO

MIX ALL YOUR FUCKIN' FOOD IN THE BOWL WITH THE HUGE OVERSIZED SPOON YOU RECIEVED WITH YOUR FOREST OF CHESTHAIR

NOW SPOON THAT SHIT INTO THE HALF A TIGERBREAD, MAKING SURE TO HOLD IT UPWARDS BY THE END BECAUSE OTHERWISE IT'S GONNA BE ALL OVER THE FLOOR AND GOD FUCK DAMNIT YOU SPENT 30 MINUTES PREPARING THIS SHIT

ANYWAY

SPOON IT IN, THEN ADD MORE GRAVY/SAUCE. I MEAN FUCKING GO TO TOWN WITH THAT SHIT

YOU MIGHT WANT TO USE THE HUGE BOWL FROM EARLIER AS A PLATE WHILE EATING BECAUSE THE GRAVY IS GONNA GO GODDAMN EVERYWHERE AND I DOUBT YOU GUYS ARE FANS OF GRAVYBATHS

AND THERE YOU HAVE IT

MANWICH

 

[GmK]

Meganwichtron, you win. First post to make me smile and even chuckle a bit in a long while. Well done. Go and buy some Stuff from that manly compliment, you whore.

 

[James81818]

Ahhh cooking. A true passion of mine.
Today I shall show you how to make one of my favourite dishes. I am on my iPhone so can't upload a picture, so th finishing result is something you can only see if you give this a go.

Difficulty level: unbelievably hard
Time taken: At least 2 hours

Now, the recipe I have picked is a personal one, I made it myself. I like to call it 'water'.

Step 1: Go to your cupboards and look for a glass. This must be a special glass. An important glass. I advise you spend at least an hour looking for a glass suitable for this task.

Step 2: Close the cupboard again. This should take about 15 minutes.

Step 3: Right, this is the tricky bit. Go to your sink and turn the tap on. Wait for an hour with your finger under the water. It must be at the correct temperature, or this won't work.

Step 4: Put the water in a glass, very carefully. Don't spill any. DO NOT WASTE THE BEAUTIFUL WATER.

Step 5: Enjoy it! You fantastic cook you.

And your done!

I would recommend people only to try this if they are experts at cooking.
Really.
I mean that.

I have only made two mistakes cooking and I am barely worth making this excellent dish.

My mistakes where setting a pot on fire and blowing up a toastie maker.

Thank you for your time,
A true cooking master.

 

[Damer_Flinn]

I'm going to do a massive Necro-post because I just made something on a whim and it tasted great.
(Though not really because a necro-post only qualifies when it adds nothing substantial to the original thread.)

Spoiler: Picture, Picture

1/2 pound ground beef
1 can diced potatoes
1 small can corn
1 small can green beans
1/2 small can peas
1 handful baby carrots, cut
1/4 onion, diced
garlic powder
cayenne pepper
pasta, elbow

Boil some water and fully cook your pasta as the directions on the box state.

Chop the ground beef with a hard spatula while cooking it, cook fully until browned.
Remove the beef from the pan but leave the drippings
Strain the water from the can of potatoes into the pan, add the onions and simmer.
When the onions are cooked add in the potatoes, beans, peas and corn.
Chop the carrots and add them to the pan. (adding them last leaves them with a bit of a crunch)
Sprinkle with garlic powder and cayenne pepper.
Mix in the ground beef you cooked earlier, cover and let sit to give the spices time to work.

Drain the remaining water from the pan and dump the mixture into a large bowl and mix in the pasta.